Christmas Cupid Takes Aim

May 31, 2013 by

You’ve made your list and checked it twice. Aunt Joan is getting slippers, and your brother is getting golf gloves. But the spot next to your sweetheart’s name remains blank. The pressure to find the perfect gift can be overwhelming, but if you tap into your sense of romance and ingenuity, you might find that you have just the thing to elicit a delighted kiss from your sweetie on Christmas morning. Here are some ideas that will help get your creative juices flowing.

Customize Your Affection – Anita Thompson <www.anitajewelry.com> , who creates kiln-fired glass jewelry, suggests custom baubles for a tender gift idea.

“If you don’t know her favorite color,” directs Thompson, “choose jewelry that complements the color of her eyes.”

Paintings, pottery or other artisan designs can also be created with your partner’s taste in mind.

Fulfill a Dream – How many times has he said that “someday” he’s going to own a hot Corvette convertible? Make him a king for a weekend and arrange to rent his dream car. Find a miniature model or ornament of it to wrap and tuck under the tree. When he opens it, explain that you plan to zoom away for a weekend of his choice in the wheels he’s always wanted. Avis and Hertz both offer Corvettes in limited cities, but some local, non-chain agencies provide this car, too.  If a fancy sports car isn’t possible in your town, a limo stocked with a bottle of bubbly for a night on the town with you may be just the thing to make him smile.

Enhance Knowledge – Expand your partner’s mind by giving the gift of education. Contact a Spanish tutor and purchase five lessons. Wrap the gift certificate with a beginning Spanish book and a coupon to a local Mexican restaurant. Or plan to learn together. Contact your local dance studio for a beginner’s package. In no time, your one moment of romance will blossom into many opportunities to hold each other close and relive the intimacy of the holidays.

Geocasche Your Love – Give your sweetheart a treasure hunt in the form of a pocket GPS. Visit different points around town and program them into the unit. Purchase small gift cards at each place and tuck them into numbered envelopes that correspond with the numbered points in the GPS. Wrap them all together to slip under the tree.  When your holiday honey successfully tracks down a point, he or she can open an envelope and be treated to another surprise.

Craft Some Coupons – Pick up a package of colorful index cards at your local office supply store and get creative. Draw a picture of the fridge for a free kitchen cleaning, a picnic basket for a free “I’ll cook,” or a pair of feet to suggest a foot rub. Cut tabs across the bottom for six free “I’m sorrys” to really win your love over. Whatever your Christmas Cupid likes, make it into a coupon.

Take Flight – Sweep your love off her feet in an airplane or a hot air balloon.

“Flight has many appeals: freedom, nostalgia, romance, scenery, science,” explains John H. Campbell, Chief Glider Pilot at Mile High Gliding in Boulder, Colo., <www.milehighskyride.com>. “Our glider flying provides silence, more viewing area than that available in a typical small airplane and is available to the public with no prior experience, training or physical prowess.”

Airports around the country are home to small companies that will happily participate in your Kris Kringle creativity by offering a flight of fancy for about $200. Look in your local phone book under “aircraft charter, rental or leasing” to find an airplane ride, or search under “balloons – hot air” to silently lift off under a brightly colored orb.

Be Insightful – Show your Mr. or Mrs. Claus that you’ve been listening to those little desires all year. Notice that he’s wanted a new tool belt and give him one filled with the little tools he can’t ever find at his fingertips. Remember that she wished for a deviled-egg plate, water ski gloves or a massage at the local spa.  Small things that are only mentioned one time in passing can seem very significant when wrapped and tucked under the tree. They show that you listened, cared and tried to find a sweet way to please.

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10-12 years.” — Robert Parker 91-93

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School Conferences

May 31, 2013 by

The notice just arrived from school that it’s parent-teacher conference time.  Whether you greet the news with dread or enthusiasm, get ready to make some plans.  Across the country parents are gearing up to experience their first one-on-one interaction with the person who spends more waking hours with their child than they do.  Will the news be good or bad?  How will it reflect on them?  What can be done?

Lisa Brandt, a veteran kindergarten teacher in Eau Claire, Wis., has seen the panic in parents’ eyes when they arrive at their first conference.

“It’s important to realize that teachers are all on the parents’ side with the common goal being the child’s success,” says Brandt.

Aside from the fact that parents all spent 12+ years learning to respect – and perhaps sometimes to fear — their teachers, it’s time to redefine that attitude in an effort to benefit the kids.  Parents need to see teachers as useful partners who will help shape their children into the adults they will someday become.  Likewise, teachers view parents’ inside knowledge about their children’s abilities and personalities as the keys that will make teaching a much simpler task.  Brandt explains that one simple comment from a parent like, “Suzie’s best friend moved away last year,” might explain a whole host of behaviors and challenges that can be easily overcome by a teacher armed with this new insight.

Guy Granger, the father of two Seattle teens who is seasoned at this type of conference, says, “Most important:  Be pleasant and supportive.”  Being defensive about your child’s performance will only be destructive.  The value of this meeting will come from being constructive as you learn where challenges and growth areas lie for your son or daughter.

Make it a point to listen to what the teacher has to say.  He or she will have gathered work samples to share and will have identified some key elements to discuss with you.  Try to learn what the teacher’s goals are for your child during this school year, and feel free to share your own.  Be ready to take notes as you talk about one of your favorite topics: your child.

In order to prepare for a conference, make a list of points that are of concern to you and your son or daughter so that you don’t forget what to talk about.  The meetings are brief and fly by quickly, so be on time, come without children in tow if possible, and have your questions ready.  The National Education Association suggests the following questions as a place to start:

  • How well does my child get along with others?
  • What are my child’s best and worst subjects?
  • Is my child working up to his or her ability?
  • Does my child participate in class discussions and activities?
  • Have you noticed any sudden changes in the way my child acts? For example, have you noticed any squinting, tiredness or moodiness that might be a sign of physical or other problems?
  • What kinds of tests are being done? What do the tests tell about my child’s progress?
  • How does my child handle taking tests?
  • How can my child do better, and what can I do to help?

The teacher and student are only two corners of this important triangle.  At the parent-teacher conference, you will have an opportunity to find out how you can enrich and strengthen the learning environment.  Ask the teacher how you can participate with the class, volunteer in the school or supplement your child’s educational experience.  Exchange e-mail addresses so that you can quickly message questions or concerns whenever they arise.

The first parent-teacher conference of the year is an opportunity to set the tone for the months and grades ahead.  Make it positive.  Don’t worry that your child is a direct reflection of you and become argumentative.  Rather, make this the first step to being in constant communication with your child’s teacher.  Kids are smart.  If they find that the parents and teachers are all on the same page, they will sooner realize that school is important and requires their full attention.

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Insurance Info

May 31, 2013 by

Asking for an explanation of insurance is a bit like opening Pandora’s proverbial box. Insurance exists to cover almost any situation, and there are plenty of agents and companies who are enthusiastically prepared to sell it to you. But how do you know what you really need? How can someone without hands-on experience navigate the vocabulary and fine print that accompanies any insurance policy?

The first step is to understand the structure that supports the insurance industry. There are hundreds of insurance companies to choose from, but the person you find when you flip through the phone book is only their agent. Some companies, like State Farm, AllState and American Family, have agents called “direct writers” who sell only their company’s policies, but some of those are expanding to represent other carriers that are carefully screened by the parent company. Other insurance companies sell their policies through “independent” agents. Instead of having a symbiotic relationship with one company, these agents deal with many companies to find good rates and policies for their clients.

Ken Mullen, an agent for State Farm Insurance, recommends doing a little comparison shopping before selecting an insurance company.

“Call local body shops and contractors to see which company they would like to work with,” suggests Mullen. “There is no substitute for the research [consumers] do about the products [they] need to buy; even insurance,”

Standard and Poor’s <www.standardandpoors.com> has assessed the financial integrity of insurance companies for 37 years and is an excellent place to check a company’s ability to meet financial obligations. If there is a catastrophe in your area, you want to be sure your insurance company will be able to meet its commitments.

Some companies like GEICO and AIG sell insurance policies directly to consumers on the Internet.  A savvy shopper might select exactly the right kind of insurance, but most people need help understanding what is necessary and available. When your house burns down or your child is in an accident, you might regret having missed out on policies that an agent could easily have helped you find.

“If you have anything of value, including yourself, you need insurance,” warns John Killey, an independent insurance agent in Eau Claire, Wis., “but insurance is complicated.”

A good agent can help you succeed in your search. The decisions you reach together on how to insure you, your family and your property will be as individual as you are, so you want to choose someone who will understand you and have the best ability to weave your safety net. To find this person, do some research and ask for referrals. You can find information about particular agencies by calling your state’s Insurance Department. Look for that contact information online at <www.naic.org>.

Once you have settled on an agency, actually go to the office and meet the staff.

“People buy the agent, they don’t buy the insurance company,” affirms Killey.

And Mullen agrees, “You are depending on someone to help you set up coverage that will deter a financial crisis should there be a loss due to accidents, weather, injury or death,” he says. “These events are important enough to take the time to get to know the agent and staff personally.”

Trust your intuition. See how you feel about the agent with whom you’ll be dealing. Then ask some questions that will help you assess the agent’s capability to meet your needs.

* What are the agent’s credentials? With which professional organizations is he affiliated? Does he pursue continuing education?

* Does this agent represent all types of insurance: auto, homeowners, liability, health, etc.? Can she handle all of your insurance needs, or will you need to choose other agents for specific policies?

* How long has the agent been in the business? An agent with experience can more easily evaluate your needs and match you up with the best policies.

* How accessible is this agent in case of an emergency? Does he have Internet, cell phone and office hours that are compatible with your needs?

* How will quoted rates change after a claim? Perhaps an attractive premium will not remain so attractive after a speeding ticket or fire.

Finally, bear in mind that the most expensive insurance policy isn’t necessarily the best. When you find the agent you trust, let him or her determine the right policy for you.

Says Killey, “With a good plan, the benefits outweigh the expenses.”

And with a good agent comes a good plan.

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How Was Your Day….?

May 31, 2013 by

How many times has a query about your child’s day been met with a glazed stare, shrugged shoulders or the one-word answer, “Fine.”  Getting into the mind of a child can be akin to breaking into Fort Knox.  There has to be a secret code, but what is it?  It seems impossible, but there are some sure-fire ways to engage your child and become privy to the goings-on about which every parent wants to be aware.

Plant the seed of communication before your child even knows what you are up to.  Make a routine of snuggling your daughter into bed with the lights out and whispering in her ear, “What was the best part of your day?”  Be sure to include asking about the worst part, too.  That might be the one part of the day she wouldn’t have told you about otherwise, perhaps the root of anxiety or unhappiness that you can then handle before it becomes a larger issue.  Offer your highs and lows, too, edited for young ears, so that she can see that everyone has ups and downs in life and that you value her enough to share yours.  You will soon earn her trust in return and be included in her private thoughts.

Joan Bohmann, PhD NCSP, is the director of professional standards and continuing professional development for the National Association of School Psychologists and a supporter of laying groundwork as soon as possible for family communication.

“If, during early school years, children know that the parent is going to ask what they learned today, it becomes a standard topic in which all are expected to take part.  Then the pattern is set for older years.”

Brittany Granger, a Seattle teen, is experienced in the communication battle between generations.  She suggests treating kids with sincerity.  If children feel belittled, they will withdraw, and if they feel threatened, they will hide truths and avoid any communication at all.

Says Granger, “Parents need to gain the trust of their child if they expect to be told anything.  They need to listen and respect the feelings and thoughts of the child.  Parents need to look at the situation, whatever it is, from the child’s point of view, be calm and respectful and not yell or swear.”

Bohmann agrees and adds, “Parents need to be careful to listen and validate the students’ point of view rather than jump in with the ‘right answer’ or ‘right way’ to think about something.”

Meet your son’s friends and teachers.  Volunteer in the school if you have time, and participate with class activities as often as possible.  Schools are constantly sending home announcements.  Scour them for potential conversation starters about upcoming projects, school programs, retiring teachers, peer successes and any other topic you can find.   Ask your son’s friends carefully placed questions, and the answers you receive will become conversation-starters to use at home.

A question that can be answered with a one-word answer most likely will be, so ask open-ended questions that can’t possibly be satisfied with a “yes,” “no-,” or “fine-,” answer.  Instead of asking how your daughter’s day was, ask about specifics.  Ask what kind of math problems she is working on, what she read during her free time and what exercises she did in gym class.  You’ll get short answers, but each will open a door to more questions.  Relate similar stories from your youth, and you’ll likely elicit questions that can easily be bounced back to her.

Consider your child’s age when you gear up for an after school-chat.  Younger kids will be open and eager to tell you about their day right away.  Parental attention at that age is key, and they’re ripe for conversation.  Tweens and teens usually need a little time to themselves before they’re willing to talk.  It’s better to let them come home and shift gears from school to family before you start asking questions.

Of older kids, Bohmann suggests, “Ask questions about the day while working on another task.  If the student helps set or clear the table, that may be a good time to talk.  Boys might do better while engaged in an activity such as shooting baskets or being active.”

In any case, you must be a super-sleuth to gather the tidbits that will point the way into your child’s mind.  Tiny clues about their life litter yours, and it’s your job to collect them.  The treasure you gain will be a life-long bond with one of the people you hold most dear.

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Healthy Snacks

May 31, 2013 by

Whether it’s mid-morning, after-school or bedtime, growing kids sometimes need a snack.  Although it’s cheap and easy to grab a bag of chips, a cookie or a candy bar, the best choice is something that satisfies hunger while it meets the changing nutritional needs of growing children.

Elisa Zied, MS, RD, registered dietitian, spokesperson for the American Dietetic Association and author of Feed Your Family Right! (Wiley, 2007) points out that, “[Parents] need to focus more on calcium-rich snacks.”

As children grow, “calorie and nutrient needs increase,” explains Zied.  “Teens need more iron, girls because they menstruate and need to replace losses, and boys to support increases in lean muscle tissue.  They also need increased calcium as they develop peak bone mass.”

The challenge for parents is in how to meet the nutritional needs of their children while generating enthusiasm for healthy foods.

For fifteen years, Michelle Kooiker has been teaching elementary and preschool in northern Wisconsin.  Her struggle has been to entice picky eaters at snack time, and her creative technique seems to pay off.

“Sometimes kids are turned off by unfamiliar textures, so I ask them to break it down into steps,” says Kooiker, “the first of which is to ‘kiss it goodbye.’”

Kooiker’s method is to have a balking child bring a new food to his or her lips for a kiss.  Sometimes the taste on the lips is enough to tempt a bite.  Sometimes it takes longer to become comfortable with a new flavor and texture.  After a positive connection has been made to the food, she encourages a nibble.  Later on, she suggests a bite.  Before too long, the introduction is a success, and the child is picking up something new to “kiss goodbye.”

What defines a healthy snack food?

“Parents should think of snacks as extensions of meals and should include foods that fall into the key food groups:  dairy, fruits, veggies, grains, lean meats/beans,” says Zied.

Creative presentation is also helpful in selling these snacks to kids.  Peanut butter spread on celery with raisins on top becomes “Ants on a Log.”  Guacamole and hummus can be “Monster Mash” into which carrots, pita chips or jicama can be dipped.  Spinach and cheeses combine to make a great dunk for multigrain crackers and veggies.  Sweet dips are popular, too.  Blend honey with mascarpone, cream cheese or peanut butter and plunge sliced apples or graham cracker sticks into the tasty mix.

For the parent with little free time for whipping up specialty dips, low-fat pudding, chocolate milk and single-serving cheese sticks can provide a speedy calcium boost for kids.  If it’s your day to provide a snack for the class at school, bring yogurt.  Add a dollop of Cool Whip, and the kids have an activity food for stirring and cracker-dunking.  If there are 10 squealing tweens in your living room for a sleepover, sprinkle air-popped corn with tasty seasonings for their movie treat.

Avoid highly processed foods if at all possible.  Instead, buy fresh fruits and vegetables for easy munching.  Clean, slice and store them in a clear bowl in the refrigerator where they are easy to see and consume.  Sliced oranges are easier to approach than whole ones, and prepared berries are more fun to tackle than ones with stems.  A clear tray of carrots, cherry tomatoes, sliced cucumber and broccoli with a tasty dip or salsa is a quick sell to hungry kids.

A good dose of fruits and vegetables will help keep kids hydrated, which is important in maintaining good health.  Water is the best drink for kids, followed by fat-free milk.  But a cup of 100 percent fruit juice per day or a sport drink from time to time can be a treat.

To be sure kids are hydrated enough, Zied advises that they have, “enough water and other liquids so that their urine is pale in color, not yellow.”  Deep color and odor indicate dehydration and disappear with the proper amount of fluid intake.

Include kids in their own snack selections.  Talk about food groups and healthy choices.  Include them in the purchase and preparation of their snacks, and lead by example.  A kid won’t choose sliced cucumbers if Mom is tearing into a bag of Cheetos.  Keep the experience fun, and don’t make snack-time into a food battle.  By being a positive role model, you will instill in your children life-long habits that will set them off on good, long lives.

 

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Halloween By Hand

May 31, 2013 by

In the quest for the most imaginative Halloween costume, the convenience of a ready-made costume can be a temptation. But the pride that comes with creating your own costume is heady, and the price can’t be beat.

Charlene Sarmiento of Goodwill Industries International Inc. says Goodwill’s highest retail sales of the year occur in October.

“Buying and even renting Halloween costumes can be expensive,” she said. “Goodwill stores offer gently worn costumes and clothing at affordable prices.  All you need is a little imagination to build a unique costume.”

Another consideration is your own level of creative comfort.  Are you better with sewing, glue guns or duct tape?  Then scour your closet and drawers for the gems that will take your costume to new heights.

“Start with something from another year and accessorize it in a different way to create an entirely new costume without the expense of a whole new one,” suggests Aimee Weber of Jo-Ann Fabric and Craft Stores.

A cape can be the foundation of a wizard, witch or queen costume, and the right cocktail dress can adorn a movie star, Cleopatra or the bride of Frankenstein.  Creative craft additions can also add zip to otherwise mundane closet items.  A pair of old bell-bottom pants is transformed into Elvis duds with sparkly jewels.  A can of gold spray paint, a tasseled drapery tieback and a wreath of silk ivy can transform a tired white sheet and flip-flops into a Greek god or goddess.  Jack-o‘-lanterns carved from the bottom make perfect scarecrow heads when they top off simple overalls.

Attach green or purple balloons to similarly colored clothes and become a bunch of grapes.  Use fewer “grapes” at the bottom of the outfit to make the “bunch” appear naturally tapered.  If you feel more inspired, dangle white balloons and a small shower curtain from a hula hoop.  Attach the entire contraption to a stick tied around the waist of a shower-capped and bubble-filled bather.  Multicolored balloons affixed with safety pins to a wearer carefully wrapped in clear plastic become a bag of jelly beans.

Couples dressing up together are able to pull off witty costume tricks.  A flowered dress from Goodwill and military fatigues from a surplus store celebrate Halloween as “War and Peace.”  Or divide fatigues between two wearers to become “Upper and Lower GIs.”

A waiter’s outfit partnered with someone in a jogging suit unites to “Hurry Up and Wait.”  Throw on jammies and head out with a red-spotted thermometer-bearing friend as “Sick and Tired.” Tie rocks onto one old shirt and empty paper towel rolls onto another and you’ll be ready to “Rock and Roll.”  Wear a shirt with the number 3.1415926 on it and stick with someone dressed as a pumpkin to be as cute as “Pumpkin Pi.”  Don boxing gloves and go with a hula-skirted buddy to give a “Hawaiian Punch” to the evening.

If you’re going out as a family or a group, surround one smock- and beret-wearing painter with his “works of art” who sport paint-splattered T-shirts.  Attach felt P’s to the shirts of your gang and blacken their eyes to create a bunch of black-eyed-peas.  Parents with small children can dress as farmers who trick-or-treat with kids in second-hand animal costumes and collect their treats in milk pails.

If you need more help in making costumes, plenty of supplies, how-to sheets and ideas for all capability levels are available at craft stores. Whether you are ready to sew up a storm or prefer to glue your costume together, you can find plenty of inspiration and materials.  A pink sparkly robot and a no-sew owl are just two of the costumes available for busy parents at Jo-Ann Fabrics this year.

No matter what your level of artistry, there is a costume out there for you.  If all else fails, grab a quarter and a hammer.  When asked what your costume is, just put the quarter on the table, give it a whack and say, “I’m a quarter pounder.”

 

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Gingerbread Houses

May 31, 2013 by

 

Icicles hang from a snowy rooftop, brightly colored bulbs shimmer from frosty eaves and candy cane decorations line a curving sidewalk. This isn’t a scene from a holiday greeting card — it’s what you can create with a good gingerbread recipe and a touch of creativity.

MADE FROM SCRATCH

For centuries European bakeries have turned out gingerbread houses using molds created by master craftsmen. In France, a special guild was formed for these bakers of “pain d’epices,” and an annual fair ran for 800 years to celebrate their special breads. But it was the Grimm Brothers’ story of Hansel and Gretel that earned these sweet houses their spot in history.

“They were very popular in Switzerland, where I grew up,” explains Guido Landoldt, the executive pastry chef at the Hyatt Regency Lake Tahoe. “We used beautiful molds that were hundreds and hundreds of years old and carved into hard wood.”

Those antique molds are no longer available, but don’t let that stifle your creativity. There are many other ways to make this tasty seasonal centerpiece.

The most traditional way is first to bake the gingerbread that will become the walls, doors, chimney and roof. After the gingerbread cools, decorate the exterior walls while they are flat on a work surface, but be sure to frost the interior as well as exterior corners for added strength when you assemble the cottage.

Landoldt suggests royal frosting as the best glue and claims it’s stronger than liquid nails. Mix three egg whites, 1 pound powdered sugar and a pinch of cream of tartar together gently.

“Use a paddle instead of a whisk and mix slowly for seven to 10 minutes to avoid incorporating any air molecules,” he suggests.

Cover your icing with a damp towel until you are ready to begin gluing and decorating your project. Be sure to have plenty of pastry bags and frosting tips on hand to create different textures.

 USE A KIT

If baking isn’t your forte, start with a kit. John and Janet D’Orsi have been making this possible since 1981 at the Gingerbread Construction Co. in New England <www.gingerbreadusa.com>. They ship undecorated kit houses as well as fully finished houses anywhere in the 48 contiguous United States.

Don Granger, a retired construction worker in New Auburn, Wis., appreciates the particulars of construction and enjoys building gingerbread kit houses with his grandchildren.

“Making a gingerbread house with youngsters gives them an experience they couldn’t have without an adult,” says Granger, “and at the same time it teaches them where things go and why.”

Granger’s experience has taught him that creativity in decoration is part of the fun. He has used green frosting on overturned ice cream cones for trees, cotton candy for smoke and jelly beans for festive lights. To create a landscape, he covers a board with foil and paints it with diluted royal frosting. A path of chocolate bars lined with candy canes finishes the scene.

MAKE THEM INTO COOKIES

Not up to building an entire house? Consider the Betty Crocker recipe for gingerbread cookies from <www.bettycrocker.com>. These take less time and are delicious to eat. Frosting can still drip from eaves, shredded wheat can line the roof and peppermints can adorn the front door.

 FOR THE YOUNGER CROWD

Very young children might not have the skills or patience to make a gingerbread house, but that doesn’t need to stop them. Beverly Cavanaugh, coordinator of the Early Childhood Center at Joliet (Ill.) Junior College offers this kid-friendly tip.

Use empty half-pint milk cartons to create a base for a graham cracker “gingerbread” house. Adhere crackers to the sides and top of the cleaned milk carton with royal frosting. Horizontally place graham cracker sticks for a log cabin effect, and make shingles from colorful gum or flat nuts.

To create a special gift, leave the spine of the container poking up between the graham cracker roof pieces.

“If you punch a hole in the ridge, you can hang it as an ornament,” suggests Cavanaugh. “Pipe more royal icing around the hole to look like snow on the roof.”

A picture slipped into the door or window can appear to peek out of the ornament which is easily preserved with a layer of shellac or a light wash of glue.

“After the frosting sets up, mix some craft glue and a few drops of water to make a thin wash for the child to paint onto the ornament,” directs Cavanaugh. “Embellish after the glue wash with iridescent sequins or other decorations for added sparkle.”

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What About Education Budget Cuts?

May 31, 2013 by

School districts in every state are facing unprecedented budget cuts. Class sizes are on the rise while time in class decreases, and many schools are closing. The quality of education is in a downward spiral as districts fight to keep their lights on and classrooms supplied with minimum necessities.

The picture is gloomy, but there’s a lot you can do to help.

GET EDUCATED

Before you can fight back, you need to understand how the structure works. Budget cuts are a national problem, but according to the Department of Education, only about 10 percent of elementary and secondary education funding comes from federal coffers. The rest comes from state, local and private sources, so there are 50 different structures for funding nearly 99,000 public schools, about 56 million students.

State funds are complex to understand and often have minimums and caps that vary from state to state. In Wisconsin, for example, the state spending cap has not kept up with inflation. This means an annual local referendum is vital to maintain the status quo, and these are increasingly difficult to pass.

Roughly 46 percent of funds come from local taxes that are based on local wealth. A difference of as much as $6,000 might exist between the amount spent on each student in an affluent district and those in struggling neighborhoods.

Calculate how much money your district needs to make ends meet, and set a goal. Research how voters turn out in your area, and gear your efforts appropriately.

GET ORGANIZED

There is power in numbers. In Eau Claire, Wis., pockets of disgruntled people who wanted to reinstate field-trip funding achieved success only when every PTA/PTO in town joined together. The same kind of organization and focus are necessary to pass much-needed referendums, but to raise funds and lobby your community in support of one, you will likely have to register with your state as a Political Action Committee – whether you are a group of two or 200.

GET CREATIVE

Use catchy phrases, colorful photos and constant media attention to get people interested. Kim and Jim McNulty of the Stoughton School District in Wisconsin worked with four other couples to form Keep Improving and Developing our Schools, K.I.D.S. Their group created yard signs that called out, “Vote Yes for Quality Schools,” a phrase that yielded support for their referendum.

A bright, memorable logo, too, is helpful in burning your message into public minds. The Eau Claire field-trip group hung a sign from a school bus that read, “Pave the Way to Lifelong Learning.” Road sections were added as the fundraiser moved toward its ultimate goal.

GET CONNECTED

Get the word out about your cause. The more your effort is in the news, the more support you’ll garner. Look among your team for a PR person who is skilled in courting the media, a graphics artist to create logos and an accountant to organize finances.

A website, Facebook and e-mail are essential to communicate your issue to the world and drum up help, but some voters still prefer to be contacted by print, radio, TV or phone. Door-to-door canvassing is also an effective way to gather support. Establish a presence at community events to educate your neighbors about your mission.

GET BUSY

Bake sales and car washes aren’t enough. In addition to asking for general donations, research grants available for education funding and go to www.k12grants.org, where grant-writing is demystified. Donna Fernandez of SchoolGrants suggests creating a nonprofit education foundation to generate otherwise unavailable funds.

“Many grants that are not available directly to schools are available to nonprofits that lend assistance to schools,” said Fernandez.

Partnerships with corporate sponsors can be lucrative, too. Joe Sanfelippo, principal of Roosevelt Elementary School in Eau Claire, says a partnership with Nestle has funded his Reading Is Fundamental program and an after-school homework help program.

The Box Tops For Education program (www.boxtops4education.com) can supply up to $20,000 per school for coupons clipped from packaging. Among other programs are Kemps dairy products, which offer a Nickels for Schools program, and Campbell’s Labels for Education.

Local businesses, too, are eager to support education. Sanfilippo partners with a restaurant that shares 10 percent of its dinner profit on predetermined dates. Other businesses look for tax advantages by making education donations or matching funds.

WIDEN YOUR SCOPE

Education Secretary Arne Duncan has estimated that as many as 300,000 educators in the United States will get pink slips this year. As you focus attention on your neighborhood or district, remember that a combined effort between schools, districts and states can change the crumbling structure.

Sen. Tom Harkin, D-Iowa, has introduced the Keep Our Educators Working Act. By creating a $23 billion Education Jobs Fund, he aims to keep teachers, principals, librarians and other school personnel working through the budget shortfalls of each state.

“ Job losses of this magnitude would take a terrible toll on our education system, resulting in bigger class sizes, fewer program offerings and less time for students to learn in school. This would be a major setback for the nation’s economic recovery,” Harkin said.

 

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Keep the Love Alive

May 31, 2013 by

DATE NIGHT

The kids are bickering, the laundry is piled up and the dog needs to go out. The phone rings, the kitchen timer buzzes and your spouse walks in with a frown after a bad day at work. Sound familiar? What you two need is a good, old-fashioned date — a chance to leave the stresses of daily life behind and rekindle your romance.

Communication can easily break down between two people if they don’t catch up and share their feelings on a regular basis. Making time for a date can provide the focused time that is necessary to connect and nurture the person you hold dear.

Jake and Mary Farrell of Eau Claire, Wis., just celebrated their 42nd anniversary. They attribute the success of their marriage to regularly scheduled date nights that kept their romance alive and their friendship strong. Especially after children came along, they were determined not to view each other as “Mommy and Daddy” and forget that they were best friends first.

Instead, the Farrells explained to their kids, “You exist because we are. You are the culmination of our best efforts,” and off they’d go to strengthen the bond of their love.

Amy Pickens, M.A., of Your Place for Marriage Counseling in Philadelphia, Pa., agrees and goes a step further. She maintains that date nights are important because they offer an opportunity for couples to see each other through fresh eyes. Just as they did in the beginning, each person will put his or her best foot forward and be impressed with the other’s attempts to do the same.

Pickens points out that the positive feelings of love and affection that come from a date night will release “peaceful brain chemicals, including oxytocin, the ‘bonding hormone.’”

“Studies show that loving, nurturing and harmonious relationships are associated with faster recovery from injury and illness, longer life expectancy and a decreased risk of depression and addictions,” explains Pickens. “So date nights are like a vaccine against and a cure for the boredom, stress and conflict between couples.”

The challenge is in making the time for the date. Both people need to make regular date nights a priority. Pickens recommends making one night each week a Date Night, “so that the cumulative effects of time alone are not lost.”

That may sound expensive, but it doesn’t have to be. To cut costs, trade date nights with friends so that neither couple has to pay a sitter. The night doesn’t have to be long, either. Go for walks, play cards at a diner, sit on a blanket under the stars or park like you did when you were dating. In any case, be creative. A drink or dinner out at a favorite restaurant is always fun, but a concert along the river, a tour of a local history museum or a visiting ballet can add variety to your dates.

Alternate who will decide on the activity, and then be enthusiastic about the adventure. If she wants to drive to a winery that winds up being closed, savor the drive. If he wants to take in a ballgame with thousands of screaming college kids, hold his hand. Remember, it’s not about the activity; it’s about your time together.

Be respectful of your partner’s interests. If you know that your spouse truly loathes a particular activity, then avoid it during this time to show how much you cherish your soul mate.

“Any date that violates the values of one or both people in the couple can make time alone a disaster,” warns Pickens.

Also, be sure you have time to talk on your date. A theater performance or a movie are fun activities for Date Night, but make time after the passive activity for conversation and laughter. A late-night decaf at a hip coffee shop or a cocktail at a swanky lounge would cap off the evening with an opportunity to rehash the performances and catch up on the week’s happenings.

No matter what, remember your goal: to keep the romantic fire kindled.

Says Pickens, “the best intention for a date night is to truly savor the deliciousness of being totally and deeply concentrated on each other.”

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Holiday Shopping Smiles

May 31, 2013 by

 

 

Be Nice

Everyone hopes to be on Santa’s “nice” list, but the mad rush of holiday shopping often brings out the naughty in people. Freeman Hall, author of the recently released “Retail Hell,” manages to put a funny spin on the torture sales associates sometimes experience, but in real life it’s not so funny.

Hall says shoppers should remember that during the holidays sales associates work crazy hours in stores that stay open late. Commutes are longer than usual because many stores require employees to park off-site, and they miss out on family events, parties and their own shopping time. They are tired, their feet hurt and they have been yelled at by 10 people before you ever arrive in their department. Take a breath, keep in mind that they are someone’s dad, sister or child, too, and be kind.

“The people who were nice always got the best from me,” says Hall.  “I didn’t care about the mean and nasty people – even though I was on commission.”

Here are some of Hall’s tips for maintaining sanity and keeping everyone smiling during the busiest shopping season of the year.

 

  • A smile and manners go a long way. Nothing ruins a sales associate’s day faster than a Scrooge on steroids. Greet him or her with a jolly smile, not a crabby scowl.
  • Misperception breeds contempt. When you greet a busy clerk who looks right through you, don’t be angry. She is likely working with a customer, answering a phone call, fixing a cash register and delivering a sweater to a dressing room – all at the same time. Don’t get angry, just try again later.
  • Make it fun. Humor is contagious and defuses tense situations.
  • Trust and respect your salesperson.  Don’t turn away great customer service by running away from someone you perceive as a pushy clerk.  They know what’s hot, new and might be tucked away in a stock-room drawer.  Don’t feel obligated to go with their suggestions, but their knowledge might save you valuable time.
  • Shop early in the day. That’s when sales associates are ready to give you their best service. If it’s closing time on a late night, they’re more interested in getting home than in helping you find just the right thing.
  • Let the sales associate know you care. If another customer is being obnoxious, make a funny face behind her back. Then tell his manager what a good job he did in fielding the hostility. His appreciation will inspire extra service for you.
  • Check your holiday diva at the door. Don’t have a tantrum about something over which the sales associate has no control. If the store has run out of boxes or a hot item, that’s the CEO’s issue. Buy your gift boxes at a discount store and shop for the item elsewhere.
  • Exercise patience. If the line is long, there’s a reason. Employees call in sick, people have complicated transactions, cash registers break. Go have a coffee, do another errand and come back later. If you must stay in line, pull a good book from your handbag and relax until it’s your turn.
  • Sales associates are not your servants. Overworked employees do not have time to pick up after you, so pitch in and help. If you can’t hang a dress on a hanger properly, neatly fold it and hand it to someone who can. Don’t leave it in a wad on the floor or shoved in a shoe rack.
  • If you must shop with children, bring books, hidden pictures or Game Boys. Play “Going on a Picnic” and list with them all of the things you’ll bring from A to Z. Everyone in the store will appreciate your effort, and you’ll wind up getting the best service in return.
  • Service matters. Shop at stores that take pride in their customer service and reward their employees for treating you well.
  • Spoil your helpers. Surprise an exhausted sales associate who has helped you regularly over the year with a latte or a chocolate bar. Your effort will make someone’s day, and you’ll probably get tips on hot sale items in the new year.

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